Sunday, October 10, 2010

Knowing your Time + Homosexuality and NDE's


"I was not aware of afterlife till I lost my 18 year old son on February 14, 2007 in a fatal road accident. He was so full of life and there was so much love all around us. As time passed, I realized that he knew his date, place, and way of passing away. He had told many of his friends and they thought he was joking. I feel that his passing way 'awakened' me from my slumber and that he made a sacrifice, for he and his father, by going away like this. Earlier whatever we had read on spirituality looked all superfluous. Now, we were seeing and actually experiencing it. I learned about NDEs, ADCs, and continuity of life. Today we are at peace with his loss, but it still hurts. My question is how could he know and was aware of his passing away? He seemed to be fascinated by death when he was alive. He would tell me that he has already seen everything and there is nothing new to see for him in the world, and that he has no desire left. Was he conscious of his impending departure from earth plane? Please guide me. I have read your write up on 'Advanced behaviour syndrome' but am still unclear about this." ~Vandana


Read "We Live Forever: The Real Truth About Death." The "advanced behavior syndrome" appears in the book but so does a lot of other information that will help to put this into perspective, especially about the soul and the will of the soul.

I am sorry for your loss, Vandana, yet I acknowledge that your son "knew" things in advance and seemed ready for his own passing. With my youngest daughter, the first sentence she ever said when hardly more than a toddler was: "Am I going to die now, Mommy?" She is still alive but has had many close calls, and walks the edge between life and death even today. Also, as a child, she had vivid memories of dying in a cave-in. She was a young woman in that life and was trapped when dirt walls and ceilings fell all around her and huge rocks crushed her chest. Perhaps memories of that death caused her to question what might happen to her in this life. One can never be certain, but it's a plausible reason. Because of what I went through with her, I understand what it is like for a parent to have such a child.

Being a daughter of a police officer myself, and growing up in a police station, I can say without exaggeration that I have been around a lot of deaths, sudden deaths of both adults and children; and in every case I was privy to, these people "knew" on some level that they were going to die before they actually did. How can we know? Our soul knows. Our higher self or soul appears to have a will of its own and full knowledge of its Source and Beingness; its purpose in its own evolution and growth. We are more inclined to merge with or move closer to our soul if we maintain spiritual disciplines (like meditation, contemplation, prayer, service to others), or through creativity - our own desire to bring more beauty to the world and help to make the world a better place because we were here. We are not our body. We are not our personality. We are bigger and better than that. We are a child of God/Allah/Deity with the right to be here and to grow and learn and experience all that we can, then pass what we've gained on to others. When it's time to move on, we do, even if that means the death of the physical body. The real us, the "we" that we are, does not die. You cannot destroy energy. It just changes shape and form and frequency of vibration for its next "go-round" within the great wheel of life eternal. ~Blessings, PMH


"Hello, I think I may have e-mailed you before. My name is Michael. I am 38. I am gay, and am in a committed relationship. I unfortunately am living in a state of fear about the Bible and homosexuality. I have been studying it very carefully. I have even been going into the Early Church Fathers' writings on homosexuality. I am really lost on what to do here. I have talked to several people, and have prayed a lot about my fear. Still, I have the fear. I really hope and pray it is not a sin in God's eyes. Eternal life is so important to me. My mom passed away in August of 2004, and I miss her terribly, and my dream is to be with her again someday. It seems like I would need Jesus to come to my face and tell me not to worry about it." ~Michael


Homosexuals have near-death experiences just like everyone else. Studies have been done that were exclusive to them - a special look to see if they are different when faced with death, clinically dead but later resuscitated. No real differences appeared. Some interpret their episode with a little more hesitancy than others, hesitant because they find it a challenge to speak in public about what happened to them, who they met on the Other Side, what the Light was like, and how they felt. It's as if they were afraid of that joy, that love they found there. Once they are able to attend near-death group meetings or read books about the phenomenon, or attend conferences on the subject, they loosen up immediately. They are family. They merge with the others, because they are one of us, children of the same God/Allah/Deity, part of the same Light, bathed in the same Love as everyone else. They are one with The One.

Declarations against homosexuality are based, as near as I can tell, on health matters and personal behavior, on what the various cultures feel is moral and ethical conduct. Two people who really love each other, care for each other, and live a moral, ethical life are just as good and just as wonderful and just as blessed as anyone else. And even if you don't measure up in your mind, God/Allah/Deity makes no exceptions in love, for the love of God/Allah/Deity is unconditional. Jesus, our elder brother, our role model, never cursed or condemned or demeaned homosexuals. What is in your heart and how you express that, counts more than anyone's opinion of what is right and what is wrong. We are told to judge not, lest we be judged, and to forgive each other and ourselves for being less than than we could be or might be. A good life is a loving life.

The choice or instinct for same sex unions is a difficult role to assume. If you feel good about your life and live it with honor, who could possibly judge you? Certainly not Jesus. There are many churches now whose doors are open to all types of people - Unity, Religious Science, Unitarians, Episcopal, Methodist, and so forth. Go for spiritual guidance and comfort where you are welcomed, and be at peace. Fear shuts doors. Go where doors are open. ~Blessings, PMH


Allow me to clarify the two small books that are available about my own three near-death experiences:

"I Died Three Times in 1977" is on my website for $4.95. It is a compilation of four articles I wrote for "Many Smokes Magazine" at the request of Wabun and Sun Bear. The Magazine was published by The Bear Tribe. Wabun's mother had just died, so she asked me to write about death and what had happened to me. This compilation of articles became a self-published book. Only 50 copies were ever printed. What exists at is a copy of that earlier piece that can be downloaded.

"I Died Three Times in 1977 - The Complete Story" is new. It came out this summer as an electronic book which can be read with an electronic reader, such as a Kindle. Some people have software on their computers which enable them to access these electronic books. The cost is only $3.95 through After I finished my last book on near-death research (which comes out March, 2011), my Guidance directed me to finally combine all the bits and pieces of my own story that have been "floating" around, add the rest that is untold, and complete it. The book is not a memoir. It is just a small book that tells "the rest of my story." The only publisher to bring it out so far as a printed book will be Stigmarion in the Russian language. Their pub date will be Wintertime, 2010. This book has been reviewed and does have endorsements.

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Suicide and Spirituality


"I have read your book on Near-Death Experiences. I have a question about suicide and the soul.

"Is it possible that a soul really cannot live on earth anymore, and is called to leave?

"Is there a spiritual aspect to suicide, one that is not desperate, but that is rational, and one in which the spirit requests to leave?

"Especially for those who are sensitive, if there really is not a way to live on the earth comfortably, both for spiritual reason, and even lower level reasons like health or physical body, etc., is euthanasia or suicide acceptable?

"What is the answer from a spiritual perspective? This would be apart from the societal perspective, and especially modern western society view that tends to discourage suicide for societal reasons." ~"M"


You are asking questions that can only be answered using "the voice of the many." Please look up the chapter on suicides in "The Big Book of Near-Death Experiences." That chapter will tell you more than I can in a simple e-mail. Also, read the book, "Suicide: What Really Happens in the Afterlife" by Pamela Rae Heath and Jon Kimo (the best book I've ever read on this subject!).

Of the 3,000 adult near-death experiencers in my original research base, I asked if there were any non-nos, any "sins" that really crippled a person spiritually. The majority named two: abortion and suicide. All were quick to say that forgiveness is real, but that we must also face everything we ever did on earth. . . every single thing (a rather daunting thought). There was never a sense from anyone, including child experiencers, that we would be punished "for" our sins, but, rather "by" them. To understand "by" them, it would be helpful to have an understanding of karma or the idea of cause and effect - the concept of setting ourselves up by the actions or lack of them we make. My mother used to say: "We make our beds and then we lie in them." It's the same idea.

If you are a student of reincarnation - the idea of life after life - then karma makes sense, and so does a lot of other heavies that are difficult for us to understand if all we consider as real is one lifetime apiece. However, if we spread that viewpoint - include reincarnation or exceptional incarnations or the influence of angelic/demonic hosts or dis-incarnate interference - we then have a larger canvas on which to consider or judge possibilities.

Are there situations where suicide is appropriate or allowable or acceptable in the greater scheme of things? The answer to that question depends on the individual and his or her relationship with God/Allah/Deity. I believe the answer is yes, but, I also know in my heart of hearts that I cannot be the judge or jury here. When governments and societies legislate this, they do so with the community in mind and what is best for the greater good of all. The major religions of the world pretty much agree - they are against suicide in general but are willing to "allow exceptions" under certain conditions.

Near-death experiencers "just say no." Even experiencers who've had their episode as part of a suicide attempt - everyone of them I've yet to hear of - said, absolutely no, never to suicide under any conditions. Still, there are near-death experiencers who do indeed attempt suicide AFTER their episode anyway to get back to the Other Side. In my research base, the figure is less than 5% with adults, 21% with children (why the rate with children is so high is discussed in-depth in "The New Children and Near-Death Experiences").

As you can see, there are strong feelings and passions against suicide over all, yet it remains a temptation to the few who are troubled, want a way out, or are convinced hurrying back to the Other Side is okay. ~PMH


I'm doing some bookshows! Yup. I've never done anything like this before. Apparently there is a circuit authors can travel, whereby they buy table space, set up their books, sell them, and visit with people. I suppose every part of the country has something like this, but it is a first for me here in Virginia. So, see ya at:
October 16th, 9:30 am to 4:30 pm, Waynesboro, Virginia
Book'Em Event, put on by the local police department.
Kate Collins Middle School, 1625 Ivy Street
Public Welcome, no cost
I will be giving a talk about my work at 2 pm, and
participating in a panel discussion about writing

November 19, 11 am to 6 pm, Charlottesville, Virginia
Meet the Authors, put on by Jayne Cox
Holiday Inn University Area, 1901 Emmet Street
Public Welcome, no cost

December 4, 11 am to 6 pm, Elkton, Virginia
Authors' Book Sales & Signing, put on by Welcome Center
Elkton Welcome Center, 306 West Spotswood Trail
Public Welcome, no cost.

Seems like I'm always working on some kind of deadline and can never schedule such travels. Well, I'm doing it this time. Hope to see you at one of these, maybe all three. Let's get acquainted. ~PMH

**** Just a little reminder for 2011. The big near-death conference will be held in Durham, North Carolina in 2011. Details later.

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