Death Awareness or Near-Death Experience?

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

*** On either May 24 or 25 (2008) I will present a paper titled “Near-Death States: The Pattern of Aftereffects” at the conference on Ecstatic States, held at the Hannover Medical College, Hannover, Germany. I am told about 350 psychiatrists and professionals from various fields will be in attendance. You will be able to read my paper shortly, as a copy will be posted in the Article Section of my website at www.pmhatwater.com.

*** Don’t forget that the International Association For Near-Death Studies (IANDS) has moved. Their new contact information is: 2741 Campus Walk Avenue, Bldg. 500, Durham, NC 27705; (919) 383-7940; services@iands.org. Their website is the same: www.iands.org.

QUESTION:

“Is this a near-death experience? Please tell me what you think.

In 1996, I lost my mother to an ovarian cancer. Three days before she died, I woke up in the morning with tears running down my cheeks. I had cried during a dream. In my dream, I saw my mother in a beautiful meadow, with a evergreen forest behind her. The whole place was flooded with a wonderful golden light. My mother, although she looked terrible due to illness, looked in the dream very young and very healthy. She was all smile and happy to be where she was. I was so happy and amazed to see her in good health and suddenly back to life that I cried.

She was waving me good bye. I had the message, or the feeling, that she was telling me not to worry, that she was leaving, that she would be fine. I asked her where she was going, and she kept saying not to worry. Then I woke up. As I was in bed in my room wiping the tears off my face, the door of my room suddenly opened. My mom, who could barely walk by herself and whose brain had been tampered by the cancer, walked in, leaned on me and embraced me, as strong as she could. Then she walked back to her room and lay in bed. Following this wonderful event, I decided not to say anything to my father, believing that my mother was about to die, anytime during that day.


In the afternoon, though, I had coffee with my father in the kitchen. My mother was in bed. As we were having coffee, my father suddenly tells me that he woke up that morning... crying. That he had seen my mother in a wonderful place: a meadow, huge trees in the background, waving him good bye. Exactly the same dream I had had that very same morning. I was stunned. I told him that I, too, had seen her in my dream.

My mother passed away three days later. We buried her the next day. The following day, a woman came to visit us. She used to come to help for cleaning and cooking when my mother was alive. Actually, she was the only one who came to help (close relatives, that my father and mother had helped out so many times, were nowhere to be seen when my mother's health started to decline, although they were staying two minutes away... on foot. But this is another matter).

Anyway, my mother was very grateful that this woman would spend time to help. This woman came home and told us that three days before my mother died, she had a dream. At our bewilderment, it was the exact same dream that my father and I had.

I don't know about coincidences. My father and I had endured for the last eight months considerable stress due to my mom's illness. And I can understand that, perhaps, this dream could have been just a burn out effect. But this "third party", I can't explain. I believe it was great. I just knew, somehow, that my mom would be OK where she would go. I also know, that close relatives who didn't help, who turned away their head, who didn't basically care about her, didn't get any "message".

Now, I would love to know if my mother had a near-death-experience three days before she passed away, and if she did, have my father, this woman and myself, been part of it?”…..Murat

ANSWER:

This is not a near-death experience. This is death awareness.

I am convinced that all of us, whether we admit it or not, know when we are going to die. I have written at length about this and the research I did concerning death awareness back in the sixties and seventies, even as a child during all those years I spent in the police station waiting on my father to get off duty so we could go home (dad was a police officer).

People show this awareness in a myriad of different ways, but, usually, they follow a certain behavior pattern that can start a year before, three months before, or three days before. Why the majority follow those particular intervals, I do not know. Not only are people aware, but, to the best of their ability, they let their significant others know, too. The dreamstate is the most common “vehicle” of this type of communication.

With your mother it was three days before. She was alert and determined to say her last goodbyes, convey the love that was inside of her, pass along what was in her heart. We could say that she instigated the dreams all three of you had. We could say that her soul spread the message. We could say that the soul of each of you simply “knew” and conveyed that knowledge to you in the most loving way possible. Which one is correct? Perhaps all three suggestions. We have no way to be certain. We just know that in the spiritual worlds, all things are possible and that love always reaches out and touches the hearts of those who are loved.

All three of you have been blessed in ways that will change how you view the spiritual worlds, life and death, and the power of love. I refer you to my book “We Live Forever: The Real Truth About Death” for a more indepth discussion of this very thing – death awareness and the power of the soul.

Many blessings, PMH